Boundaries keep us safe and assure our relationships are healthy.
The limits we set protect us from being used, manipulated, or violated by others.
Clear boundaries allow us to separate our personal identity, thoughts, and feelings from the ones we’re in relationships with.
Most of us are comfortable with setting boundaries with the adults in our life, but when it comes to our children we struggle finding the line of appropriate and fair. We’re told as parents we are responsible for our children and need to ensure they are safe, secure and happy… that last one, happy, is a huge undertaking.
Securing someone’s happiness is impossible, but we’re expected, as parents, to ensure our children are happy otherwise they will not be healthy, successful or fulfilled.
But what if we put a boundary on that one? Happiness. What if we said no to that one?
Would it make us horrible parents? Lazy, neglectful or inconsiderate?
We think that role modelling boundaries with your children is not unhealthy, in fact it would be a gift to them.
They’re always watching you and will follow your lead on what’s acceptable.
Showing children what healthy boundaries looks like, gives them a blueprint that establishes what is and isn’t acceptable for them in their future relationships.
You’re also building a relationship with your child that is sustainable for many years to come. One that allows you to introduce independence early, paying them the respect they deserve, without any feelings of neglect or separation anxiety.
Furthermore, your child gets a more intimate insight into your emotional capabilities without the façade of hierarchy or archetypes.